The Philanderer
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Dastardly and Muttley
I was out in Brick Lane at the weekend, a marvellous collection of neon lights which celebrate the culinary delights of the local Bangladeshi community. The restaurants stretch as far as the eye can see , and the pukka wallahs stand outside every establishment trying to entice locals and tourists alike into their curry house. It was huge fun.
As I had walked my wife round half of Shoreditch, however, she was not best pleased we had past the turnoff twice without going down it. I was fortunate, therefore, to be able to offer her a seat in a traditional East End boozer, The Spitalfields Arms. Here I was presented with my beer drinking nightmare as they had both London Pride and Doom Bar on tap. Doom won , as I can get Pride anywhere these days, and a fine drop it was particularly as it had to travel all the way from Newquay.
While drinking, we discussed the range of 'Little Asias' we now have at our disposal. The Rusholme curry mile on the outskirts of Manchester is by far the biggest collection of curry houses I have seen, and Birmingham has its own Balti Boulevard in Sparkbrook courtesy of the large Kashmiri population who live there. The Birmingham outlets are mostly BYO but I suspect the restaurants all own the offie next door to ensure maximum revenue!!
Closer to West London of course is Southall with its varied and excellent curry houses, Ritas Cafe being one of my favourites, and Ealing has a few goodies as well. I remember in my student days going into Whitechapel on a Wednesday evening and always having chicken on the bone, as it was 50p cheaper. That seems to be a option no longer offered in most places.
So, where did we end up eating? Well our first choice, the Monsoon, reminded me of Groucho Marx great expletive, 'I would never join a club which had me as a member' as the place was populated with the East End equivalent of the post rugby crowd out for a lively time. So we moved to the Chat, a bit off piste, but well regarded. Sadly as we got there the chef had a dippy fit and walked out so no chance of food there then!! Third choice was a very pleasant Southern Indian outlet where we feasted well on the usual diet of too many main courses and an over abundance of sides......but it all got dusted off.
Now, if I were to stand for, and be elected, Mayor of London, one of my pledges would be to rid London of pigeons. This is an action which I think would be a great vote winner, and its importance to Londoners was brought home to me when I awoke the next morning to find my car once again covered in the remains of the pigeon equivalent of a fruit vindaloo and special fried rice.
This gave me an idea. Curry houses were oft thought to be responsible for procuring cats and dogs off the street to embellish their dishes with. Isn't it high time that they started to turn their attention to the vast pigeon population and by so doing start to maintain their supply chain in case a new epidemic of bird flu hits the UK and wipes out our chickens. I am sure the residents of tree lined streets in Manchester, Birmingham and London would be delighted to see the little blighters exterminated in this way, and with a bit of Massala sauce you would never tell the difference.
Which got me thinking, why do you never see a baby pigeon, or Squab to give it its correct name?
As I had walked my wife round half of Shoreditch, however, she was not best pleased we had past the turnoff twice without going down it. I was fortunate, therefore, to be able to offer her a seat in a traditional East End boozer, The Spitalfields Arms. Here I was presented with my beer drinking nightmare as they had both London Pride and Doom Bar on tap. Doom won , as I can get Pride anywhere these days, and a fine drop it was particularly as it had to travel all the way from Newquay.
While drinking, we discussed the range of 'Little Asias' we now have at our disposal. The Rusholme curry mile on the outskirts of Manchester is by far the biggest collection of curry houses I have seen, and Birmingham has its own Balti Boulevard in Sparkbrook courtesy of the large Kashmiri population who live there. The Birmingham outlets are mostly BYO but I suspect the restaurants all own the offie next door to ensure maximum revenue!!
Closer to West London of course is Southall with its varied and excellent curry houses, Ritas Cafe being one of my favourites, and Ealing has a few goodies as well. I remember in my student days going into Whitechapel on a Wednesday evening and always having chicken on the bone, as it was 50p cheaper. That seems to be a option no longer offered in most places.
So, where did we end up eating? Well our first choice, the Monsoon, reminded me of Groucho Marx great expletive, 'I would never join a club which had me as a member' as the place was populated with the East End equivalent of the post rugby crowd out for a lively time. So we moved to the Chat, a bit off piste, but well regarded. Sadly as we got there the chef had a dippy fit and walked out so no chance of food there then!! Third choice was a very pleasant Southern Indian outlet where we feasted well on the usual diet of too many main courses and an over abundance of sides......but it all got dusted off.
Now, if I were to stand for, and be elected, Mayor of London, one of my pledges would be to rid London of pigeons. This is an action which I think would be a great vote winner, and its importance to Londoners was brought home to me when I awoke the next morning to find my car once again covered in the remains of the pigeon equivalent of a fruit vindaloo and special fried rice.
This gave me an idea. Curry houses were oft thought to be responsible for procuring cats and dogs off the street to embellish their dishes with. Isn't it high time that they started to turn their attention to the vast pigeon population and by so doing start to maintain their supply chain in case a new epidemic of bird flu hits the UK and wipes out our chickens. I am sure the residents of tree lined streets in Manchester, Birmingham and London would be delighted to see the little blighters exterminated in this way, and with a bit of Massala sauce you would never tell the difference.
Which got me thinking, why do you never see a baby pigeon, or Squab to give it its correct name?
Labels: balti, bangladeshi, brick lane, curry, Ealing, kashmiri, Mayor of London, rusholme, southall, squab, The Spitalfield Arms, vindaloo
¶ 4:35 PM 0 Comments
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Spiders and newts
The news that Boris Johnson has agreed to stand as prospective Conservative candidate for the position of Mayor of London will, I am sure, be greeted with mixed emotions, and these emotions will probably not be segregated by party politics, such are this man's particular characteristics.
Boris is one of the few MP's who has been asked to apologise for telling the truth, he portrays himself as a larger than life character with his frequent television appearances and he is an advocate for the use of cycles ahead of the motor , even though he loves fast cars. He could probably entertain viewers in a one man "I'm a celebrity..." or "Celebrity Big Brother", but is he the right man for the job of Mayor?
He is seen as a bumbling character, but this is an image he works hard at portraying, very few people actually dislike him, but he does have a problem with people failing to take him seriously. Like Ernest Shackleton, however, he is very good at surrounding himself with highly skilled, successful people. The Mayor of London will need such support to manage the diverse and endless tasks which the position warrants.
Then, of course, we have to ask whether 'Red' Ken is worth a third term in office. In the same way as Monty Python asked what had the Romans done for us, so Londoners could ask the same of him.
The congestion charge will probably live as his legacy, it has certainly earned a lot of money for the coffers, but has it been the success he says it is? I don't drive into London so I am not at liberty to say whether the traffic flows more freely during the day, but I see it as a bit like speed cameras. They too generate income but do they stop accidents or speeding motorists, I don't think so.
Livingstone will at last face a tough election if Boris is indeed his opponent, and Ken will be keen to win. He has his Crossrail scheme to see through, and would dearly like to be Mayor during the London 2012 Olympics albeit having to face a fourth election to achieve it. He does, however, court controversy in the same way as he indicates his opponent does. His stubbornness is illustrated by his insistence on progressing the West London tram link through Shepherds Bush and Ealing, when most of the local people are not in favour. His free travel for U18's caused a rash of streaming attacks on buses and his intransigence was evident when he failed to review and modify the scheme, and his power trip has been most evident with his insistence on taking over local planning approval from the Government, something which will allow his own personal taste for high rise and unsuitable architectural design to dominate the London development landscape for as long as he remains in power.
First of all Boris needs to be nominated as one of the Conservative candidates, then all of London get to choose whether he stands against Ken. The opportunity for tactical voting, and election fraud will reach new heights I suspect, as Labour look for ways of excluding Boris from the final election. The fact that Livingstone is already bad mouthing Boris in a sure sign of genuine concern at losing his job.
As The Times quoted "We ought to celebrate it, being the first election for decades when a maverick can't lose."
Boris is one of the few MP's who has been asked to apologise for telling the truth, he portrays himself as a larger than life character with his frequent television appearances and he is an advocate for the use of cycles ahead of the motor , even though he loves fast cars. He could probably entertain viewers in a one man "I'm a celebrity..." or "Celebrity Big Brother", but is he the right man for the job of Mayor?
He is seen as a bumbling character, but this is an image he works hard at portraying, very few people actually dislike him, but he does have a problem with people failing to take him seriously. Like Ernest Shackleton, however, he is very good at surrounding himself with highly skilled, successful people. The Mayor of London will need such support to manage the diverse and endless tasks which the position warrants.
Then, of course, we have to ask whether 'Red' Ken is worth a third term in office. In the same way as Monty Python asked what had the Romans done for us, so Londoners could ask the same of him.
The congestion charge will probably live as his legacy, it has certainly earned a lot of money for the coffers, but has it been the success he says it is? I don't drive into London so I am not at liberty to say whether the traffic flows more freely during the day, but I see it as a bit like speed cameras. They too generate income but do they stop accidents or speeding motorists, I don't think so.
Livingstone will at last face a tough election if Boris is indeed his opponent, and Ken will be keen to win. He has his Crossrail scheme to see through, and would dearly like to be Mayor during the London 2012 Olympics albeit having to face a fourth election to achieve it. He does, however, court controversy in the same way as he indicates his opponent does. His stubbornness is illustrated by his insistence on progressing the West London tram link through Shepherds Bush and Ealing, when most of the local people are not in favour. His free travel for U18's caused a rash of streaming attacks on buses and his intransigence was evident when he failed to review and modify the scheme, and his power trip has been most evident with his insistence on taking over local planning approval from the Government, something which will allow his own personal taste for high rise and unsuitable architectural design to dominate the London development landscape for as long as he remains in power.
First of all Boris needs to be nominated as one of the Conservative candidates, then all of London get to choose whether he stands against Ken. The opportunity for tactical voting, and election fraud will reach new heights I suspect, as Labour look for ways of excluding Boris from the final election. The fact that Livingstone is already bad mouthing Boris in a sure sign of genuine concern at losing his job.
As The Times quoted "We ought to celebrate it, being the first election for decades when a maverick can't lose."
Labels: Boris Johnson, Crossrail, Ernest Shackleton, Ken Livingstone, Mayor of London, newts, spiders
¶ 9:08 PM 0 Comments
